fear and responsibility
Jul. 18th, 2006 11:33 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
chelidonSome thoughts instigated by a post in ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
harpiequeen's LJ:
Fear is insidious, and it can be used as an excuse to be passive, to be "safe." And in one of the oldest tricks in the book. we can be force-fed fear by those who have a vested interest in keeping us perpetually afraid -- of rapists, of terrorists, and of gays, or "liberals," or people who don't look or act like us. And we do live in a culture of fear. What power and freedom do we give up out of the fear of terrorists? What power and freedom do we give up out of fear of rape, of assault, of humiliation, or of just being seen as a ball-buster, an asshole, a bitch, a wimp, not a "real" woman or a "real" man?
Looking at the edges of situations, the boundaries, often teaches something about what's inside the extremes. Because we're afraid of pedophiles, of media-hyped myths of poison apples, most kids don't go out on Halloween anymore, except perhaps to a mall. Children lose the chance to go out on their own and learn to be self-reliant, and to explore grappling with and overcoming an environment which is full of (mostly harmless) fear. They lose that experience of empowerment, of exploring their edges and discovering that they are more capable than they knew, that they can overcome their fears. They lose the chance to make real connections, and have a real experience. Instead, they just get another pre-sweetened neon-lit commercial experience, devoid of any real content, significance, or edgy fun. They learn to hide inside the familiar, and that you can buy the illusion of a safe world, as long as you keep spending and don't ever go outside the sanitized confines of Bennigans, Gap and Rainforest Cafe, as long as you stay inside the mass-media marketing campaigns and carefully-researched consumer demographics.
Because we're afraid of rape, or assault, we don't go out alone for a walk. A bus crashes half-way around the world, two people die, and we hear of it instantly. Should we be afraid to ride the bus? Should we be afraid to take a walk in the woods? We learn to think in worst-case scenarios. Is the chance that I, or you, may be assaulted worth missing out on a perfect sunset, or a midnight walk? Depends on how likely that assault is, perhaps, and it's impossible to escape the insidious fear when we're constantly bombarded by horror stories and worst-case scenarios.
But it's also true that rates of reported rape and assault are down across most of the U.S, and that is, in addition to population dynamics (aging population, shrinking proportion of young males, etc), also, arguably, due to education, some changes in social norms, and, yes, fear -- people being, depending on how you look at it, less risky. Is it worth it?
We have had no successful terrorist attacks in the U.S. post-9/11. That may or may not have anything to do with any specific action or actions taken by anyone in government, and there's no way to make any real causal links, though any number of people are quick to claim credit. There's no end of people in power determined to milk the situation for all the fear they can generate, and all the power they can grab because people are afraid. How much freedom are we willing to lose in the pursuit of absolute safety? How much risk is "worth it," and how much is too much?
I don't have any certain answers, nobody does -- if there were easy answers, we'd all have them and it would be a moot point. But asking the questions, and grappling with them, is one of the most important things we do as humans.
harpiequeen's LJ:Fear is insidious, and it can be used as an excuse to be passive, to be "safe." And in one of the oldest tricks in the book. we can be force-fed fear by those who have a vested interest in keeping us perpetually afraid -- of rapists, of terrorists, and of gays, or "liberals," or people who don't look or act like us. And we do live in a culture of fear. What power and freedom do we give up out of the fear of terrorists? What power and freedom do we give up out of fear of rape, of assault, of humiliation, or of just being seen as a ball-buster, an asshole, a bitch, a wimp, not a "real" woman or a "real" man?
Looking at the edges of situations, the boundaries, often teaches something about what's inside the extremes. Because we're afraid of pedophiles, of media-hyped myths of poison apples, most kids don't go out on Halloween anymore, except perhaps to a mall. Children lose the chance to go out on their own and learn to be self-reliant, and to explore grappling with and overcoming an environment which is full of (mostly harmless) fear. They lose that experience of empowerment, of exploring their edges and discovering that they are more capable than they knew, that they can overcome their fears. They lose the chance to make real connections, and have a real experience. Instead, they just get another pre-sweetened neon-lit commercial experience, devoid of any real content, significance, or edgy fun. They learn to hide inside the familiar, and that you can buy the illusion of a safe world, as long as you keep spending and don't ever go outside the sanitized confines of Bennigans, Gap and Rainforest Cafe, as long as you stay inside the mass-media marketing campaigns and carefully-researched consumer demographics.
Because we're afraid of rape, or assault, we don't go out alone for a walk. A bus crashes half-way around the world, two people die, and we hear of it instantly. Should we be afraid to ride the bus? Should we be afraid to take a walk in the woods? We learn to think in worst-case scenarios. Is the chance that I, or you, may be assaulted worth missing out on a perfect sunset, or a midnight walk? Depends on how likely that assault is, perhaps, and it's impossible to escape the insidious fear when we're constantly bombarded by horror stories and worst-case scenarios.
But it's also true that rates of reported rape and assault are down across most of the U.S, and that is, in addition to population dynamics (aging population, shrinking proportion of young males, etc), also, arguably, due to education, some changes in social norms, and, yes, fear -- people being, depending on how you look at it, less risky. Is it worth it?
We have had no successful terrorist attacks in the U.S. post-9/11. That may or may not have anything to do with any specific action or actions taken by anyone in government, and there's no way to make any real causal links, though any number of people are quick to claim credit. There's no end of people in power determined to milk the situation for all the fear they can generate, and all the power they can grab because people are afraid. How much freedom are we willing to lose in the pursuit of absolute safety? How much risk is "worth it," and how much is too much?
I don't have any certain answers, nobody does -- if there were easy answers, we'd all have them and it would be a moot point. But asking the questions, and grappling with them, is one of the most important things we do as humans.
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no subject
Date: 2006-07-18 07:34 pm (UTC)The culture of fear can also work against itself.
An example: I feel suspicious whenever I am inside a shopping mall. Because I know it is a place that tries to persuade me to spend money, I am instantly on guard. When I hear the words "shopping mall," I automatically think of overspending, mounting spirals of endless debt, foreclosures, and starvation due to lack of money to buy food.
Therefore, I don't shop very much, and I live fairly frugally.
no subject
Date: 2006-07-20 10:36 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-20 11:17 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-18 10:25 pm (UTC)I'm fascinated by this topic. It was the first thing I ever did inner work about, and I have a very intimate relationship with fear, and it's alter-ego respect.
IMO, absolute safety is an illusion. So is "a certain amount of risk," truthfully. I mean, we can calculate all we want, can't we, and in the end all that we have control over is how we respond to events. That people choose to believe and act otherwise doesn't make it otherwise. And of course the ideas of easy answers and moot points are rooted in Life Is A Sure Thing vs. Life Is Anything But, and an awful lot of people would just prefer to dwell on the former and hire someone to stamp out the latter, and go on about their business.
no subject
Date: 2006-07-20 11:03 pm (UTC)You nailed it, yes. Fear and respect, or so-called respect, anyway. Did you see "Dogma," and if you did, do you remember the speech Loki and Bartleby make in the Mooby boardroom about fear and respect? Essentially, they say that without fear (of the Almighty), humans naturally devolve into amoral creatures. I'd prefer to believe the opposite, that with freedom from fear, we are free to become who we truly are, and not who we feel we have to be. Maybe in some cases that's not a good thing, but free will requires actual volution -- a choice that is coerced by resort to fear is not a truly free choice. Which is, or course, the great moral failing of almost of the world's monotheisic religions.
I'd agree that absolute safety is an illusion, and further, the intentional pursuit of absolute safety is a way to prevent any actual growth from happening. This is a conversation particularly apropos for anyone teaching.... ;>
no subject
Date: 2006-07-19 03:16 am (UTC)Our security guard came to staff meeting today for the first time. This is a man who is afraid of everything . He's a big, burly, blustering, aging man who is waiting for/expecting/preparing for the worst at all times. "It hasn't happened yet but it could."
Everyone was listening intently through about the first third of his speech. Then we were trying not to humiliate him by openly guffawing at his Oh So Serious Talk. When it got to the part about he walks on the street, rather than on the sidewalk and we should, too, when circling the building because men have been known hide in our bushes, drinking while looking at girli magazines and may grab your ankle as you walk by...we kind of took him less seriously.
Yeah, yeah, the end is coming. Stock up because the year 2000 will be the end of it all. By all means stay home on 6/6/06 so the devil can't get you. And stay off the sidewalks because, well, they're sticky.
no subject
Date: 2006-07-20 10:46 pm (UTC)But yeah, so much of what passes for supposed common sense these days makes me giggle at least a bit. How much of living is lost when yiz live in perpetual fear, eh?
I remember that the human body has two separate neurological systems for handling pain. One processes the direct immediate pain, the other handles anticipatory pain, which is to say, the pain you feel when you are afraid of pain. I figure you know that between the two, the anticipatory pain system is actually far worse, and this has been confirmed by various clinical studies.
So in other words, over time, being constantly fearful of painful or bad things causes even more pain than actually going through them does. Seems unhelpful to me...
no subject
Date: 2006-07-21 02:25 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-20 04:10 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-20 10:53 pm (UTC)A login to your site (which frickin' rocks, BTW...) is quite tempting, but at least in the near-term, I'll be scrambling just to keep up with what's on my plate already -- for the next bit I'm out of pocket, will be in the U.K. for a few weeks teaching and making trouble, and then shoot, I've got to start heavy conditioning for this fabled wedding I keep hearing rumours about... ;> See you pretty soon, bro' (and you just *know* I'll bring a Dragon Bar with me!)
no subject
Date: 2006-07-21 12:13 pm (UTC)The absolute URl for this is http://humidcity.com/2006/07/21/culture-of-fear/
that way you can see what comments it generates down here. It is particularly apt as we try to ride out our first hurricane season since K. The fear levels in NOLA are higher thatn I have ever seen them.
Wedding
Date: 2006-07-21 12:38 pm (UTC)Sir, would you, could you, marry us? Er, um, I mean, perform the ceremony. We have a friend that we asked to do the same who evacuated and, if he returns, will probably do a blessing. We both got very excited at even the thought of your eloquency, understanding and heart helming our voyage into wedded bliss. Please? Pretty please with sticky goo of your choice on top? -A
Re: Wedding
Date: 2006-07-21 02:39 pm (UTC)I'm sure you know in what great esteem I hold strict tradition. Personally, I think you should use the old English Canterbury vows, and make George promise to be "bonnie and buxom at board and bed" ;> And you do know there's a required counselling session, right? Which in the case of you two, I can safely guess will involve massive quantities of intoxicants... Oh gosh, now you've got me *thinking*...where did I put that "Naughty Vicar" outfit? (having second thoughts yet?)
Seriously, guys, I can't think of anyone I'd be feel more honored and blessed to do this for.
And marry both of you? Dang, I better eat my Wheaties...
Re: Wedding
Date: 2006-07-21 02:42 pm (UTC)Re: Wedding
Date: 2006-07-22 12:05 am (UTC)Heh...although, as I told my fellow Casa Chaosites, the first thing I thought of was the Monty Python wedding registrar's sketch...
Chapman: "You're going to marry him? But he's engaged to me!"
Jones: "Will *you* marry me?"
Cleese: "I'm already married!"
...where they all end up married to each other. Forest agrees with me that it'd be easier for y'all to move up here... ;>