comment to yezida's post

[chelidon]

(slightly edited version of a comment made here)

What is unacceptable? I keep coming back to face that question over the last year and a half, in ways both gentle and severe.

I find that for myself, in addition to being inspired by dedication, steadfastness, service, generousity, and grace in others, I have also been blessed with being witness in the world to a wide range of unacceptable, unethical, reprehensible and despicable behaviours, to serve as crystal-clear examples of who and how not to be. Yes, it's a world of greys, but even here, there are those people, situations and circumstances that can, and really should, serve as a stark wake-up call: "you don't have to live like that," "you don't have to make the same mistakes they did/are," "you don't have to take this lying down," "you can do better than that."

I come back to Hunter S. Thompson's lovely quote, "it may be that your entire purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others." I note that can be turned around quite easily. As much as I feel it's important to live life positively, defining oneself by who and what one is, as opposed to who and what one is not, there is power and use in noting the counter-examples, the warning signs, the absolute craziness in the world, and calling it like it is.

Acknowledging that there are individual variations in personal truths doesn't mean everything is purely relative, that there is no moral obligation to stand up for what is right, and just, and good. The fact that there are people out there who abuse their beliefs, or who abuse others through their beliefs, who excuse selfish, egotistical, mean-spirited, and plain shameful behavior as just following their own truths, doesn't mean that one should excuse these reprehensible things, or, worse, fail to follow one's own convictions. There are people, actions, choices, moral and ethical stances which are unacceptable. And it is up to every one of us to stand for what we believe in. If we don't , we abdicate our birthright to manifest the world as we know it could be, as we know it should be.

There is a better world out there. And nobody but us to build it.

Comments

[rainysummerday.livejournal.com]

Well said. One thing I feel as a response when people hide their weaker behaviors behind the "this is my truth" facade is that it is often an indicator of a lack of maturity. In my experience, my process of becoming more mature over time involves taking responsibility for the impact of my actions, words and deeds. This can be a very uncomfortable process, especially when I let down my defensiveness and take a good look at some of the negative consequences of my past actions.

Now, this doesn't mean that I'm responsible for taking care of other people in a way that inhibits my real Truth by limiting myself to protect their reality filter, but it means that I live with a consciousness that I am a part of a greater web, and that causing unnecessary harm isn't serving my truth anyway. Funny, the more secure and centered I feel, the less likely I am to resort to "slash and burn" methods when things come up. This doesn't mean that I don't have blind spots, but I think I have a better idea of where and what they are, and am less likely to spiral into drama. I bless my commitment to truth and the magical maturing gifts of Time.

[chelidon.livejournal.com]

Nail, head, bang, all over the place. This is me twinkling madly. I respect your work, and the place of graceful balance and enhanced self-knowledge you seem to be finding. Or, as I was saying to one of your comrades the other day, you're not just putting on the stylish tool belt to show it off, you're actually doing the work and using the tools held upon it.

[swansister.livejournal.com]

My, my, let me tell you that I have been grappling with the exact same question of what is acceptable in my work with local government. In this new role, I struggle with learning to understand just who I am and what I believe in. How much of myself and beliefs should I allow to permeate my work? How can I sit by during meetings when citizens or petitioners are treated with disrespect by other members of this governing body? What is my duty here? What is unacceptable and what can I let pass comfortably.

I've felt very uncomfortable with myself mostly in situations where I've kept quiet during a public meeting. But on the other hand, is a public meeting the best or most effective place for me to make a stand? I'm not sure, you've got the media there and sometimes irate folks. Emotions run high and I don't think that is the best time.

I struggle and have been leaning on my practice with the iron pentacle to deepen my understanding. At times, I am confused and at others I am full of conviction.

I have learned, grown and developed a keener sense of empowerment which better enables me in my decision making process.

Damn, what a infant I was coming into this whole scene. At times I feel it is beyond my capabilities and at others I feel right on with this work.

What is acceptable? Wow! What is?

Swan

[chelidon.livejournal.com]

It is a very tough question. Especially when, as it is with your case, there's more than one hat you have to wear -- both as a person of conscience, and as someone in an official capacity or role. Is there conflict, and if so, where do your loyalties lie, where are your higher duties and obligations? I'd say let thy conscience be thy guide, and where something makes you uncomfortable, bothers you, seems dissonant, that's something to look more closely at, see why, dig deeper. And you're doing that.

It sounds to me like you're really doing the deep Work here, you've put yourself in a perfect place not only to work on your own issues, but to do good for others. Fantastic!

[lylythe-strega.livejournal.com]

Indeed - well said. There's a lot to be be said for listening to one's inner voice, and noting those red flags when they arise...there's also a lot to be said for giving people the benefit. Happy medium, yes?

Here's to 2006 without blinders. Here's to the rest of my life, and the lives of those I love, with clarity.

Compassion, self-compassion, forgiveness, and sloppy amounts of quality time would be nice, too... ;>

[chelidon.livejournal.com]

So mote it be! :>

And here's to happy mediums (they always give better readings that way!)

And yes, here's to compassion. We're all doing the best we can, even if at times that's not very good at all. That doesn't excuse damage done, nor uncaring selfishness, but it does mean we're all human.